Ugh! I haven’t written anything since the 1st???
Please know I have tried to write a little bit here and there. At my job they have installed a new software “tool” to spy and make sure we are preforming our 80% percentage – this has been making penning my thoughts difficult since the flow keeps getting interrupted by some strange WTF moment.
Speaking of WTF moments the last week was one at work (granted, I am beginning to see a pattern with my job these days). Our Team Lead is going out of the country for 2 weeks with her family leaving us double short handed (my fellow contractor was fired the 7th). So now we are down to 3 FTEs, 1 TL, and 1 Contractor (me).
Naturally during this time of 4 souls maintaining a 7 person workload our management has decided to being onboarding a new contractor. Never mind the the stress of losing a person to train said newbie instead of working production to meet our SLA SOX compliance…
Its going to be a LONG 2 weeks. Which is why I am being smart and taking the 4th off before the craziness hits on the 7th-18th. Calm before the storm!
While things have seen bleak with the job status I am hoping to hear back about a possible new position outside of this department, cross fingers!!!
One thing that I have to share though is that my job is very stressful in a way that I am finally realizing is really self imposed.
Yeah….I’m admitting to making it worse.
Deep down I REALLY want my Dept. to begin thriving and stupid shit moves like the above really tick me off and make me want to pull my hair out in handfuls. The lack of common sense is astounding at times!
“Its business, not personal.”
Its hard not to take it personal. I want success and I know our Dept could reach it. But when dumb moves are made affecting my vision of success- I take it personally. Its even harder knowing that I am “just a contractor” and will never have any sway in decisions that are being made – even when I have been with the Dept for 9 months now. I also have been told there is no plans to make me perm anytime soon.
I’ve cried with frustration of it all many times. Until I found this bit of wisdom:
This department is not my circus. These workers are not my monkeys. I wasn’t hired to fix this department and all its problems, that’s our managers’ jobs. I was hired to do a simple job (okay its not simple but uber complicated) and not worry about the bigger picture about the office politics.
Show up. Do the work. Get paid.
It would be nice if I could remember this DURING those rough days and demented times I would be a force to be reckoned with!
Normally, I would tell anyone to invest in themselves and in their passions. Work without emotions is flat and sure to fail sooner or later. However, in my current situation – becoming emotionally detached on the outcome of my work environment would be a healthy benefit for my sanity and soul.
So to sum up the month of March in My Work Life –
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.
Grant me the wisdom to change the things I can.
Grant me the wisdom to know the difference between the two,
And the tack to keep my mouth shut when in doubt.”
Now to the FUN UPDATE!
My crazy ass just signed up for my first 5 Mile race! WHOOHOO! April 26th is the date!
Yes, I am officially entered the loony bin of runners. That fine line of “just 5Kers” to “this race is too short” is the first barrier to know you are just effing insane.
It doesn’t help that My husband and I have done 3 out of 4 races this month and I’m choppin at the bit to get distance under my belt.
3/8 – Leaping Leprechauns
3/15 – Dash Down Greenville
3/22- Fight Back 5KNext Saturday 3/29 – Firefly 🙂
So far my sanity has been iffy this month. I need more self care, time off and less headaches. Its a progress for sure. One day I’ll get it down right. For now, I’m happy to take one day at a time.
Time to make dinner! Stay sane guys! I will try to do the same 🙂